Thursday, April 19, 2018

The Alabama Poop Train Saga Has Finally Come to an End

The town of Parrish, Alabama, has had a shitty 2018. In February, a train carrying a load of "biosolids" —the fancy word for human poop—from New York City stopped in town's city limits and, well, just sat there stinking up the whole town for months.

Thanks to a neighboring town's injunction to keep the crap out of its county, the turd train was trapped in Parrish on its way to an Alabama landfill company called Big Sky Environmental. So the poop just sat there, baking in the steadily warming weather and making the entire town smell "like dead bodies," while Big Sky tried to figure its shit out. The company promised to have the roughly 10 million pounds of poop moved back in February, but as March came and went, the train cars stayed.

Finally, at long last, it looks like the Parrish poop train has been flushed. According to a new Facebook post from Parrish mayor Heather Hall, the last of the poop trains were scrubbed clean of all the dookie on Tuesday afternoon and the trains will be moving on down the line shortly.

"I know this situation took longer than anyone, especially myself, had hoped it would take to come to an end," Hall wrote in her post on Wednesday. "While what happened in Parrish was, to our understanding, an unprecedented event, there are still small towns like Parrish fighting this situation on a smaller scale. I will say this over and over... this material does not need to be in a populated area... period. It greatly diminishes the quality of life for those who live anywhere near it."

Hall also called for better waste management legislation, blaming the whole months-long debacle on a massive lack of oversight. "There is no entity regulating this part of [the] process," she wrote. "And that needs to change... through legislative action. If there had been even a small amount of oversight this might never have happened."

For now, at least, Parrish residents can breathe a little easier, knowing their town isn't engulfed in flies and fumes from other people's shit.

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