Friday, May 31, 2019

The Navy Says UFOs Are Real. UFO Hunters Are Thrilled

MJ Banias is the author of The UFO People: A Curious Culture.

With the Navy's recent revelation that its pilots have been regularly spotting unidentified flying objects, some of those in the UFO community who were once thought crazy now have some concrete evidence to point to. And the regular spate of mainstream news stories about UFO sightings has inspired a new generation of UFO hunters and researchers.

I'm regularly asked why I, a 32-year-old man with a good job and a young family spent six years researching the UFO subculture. Simply put, I find the culture and the people fascinating.

Ufology has always been a counter-cultural movement. Faced with decades of ridicule, the UFO community has always been the underdog. I like underdogs. But unidentified flying objects have made a cultural comeback, and the last two years have seen a huge growth in popular media coverage of this curious phenomenon and the people who explore it. It seems that UFOs have become all the rage, and this popular resurgence is inspiring a young new breed of UFO researchers and hunters.

These last few months have seen a surge in media outlets covering the UFO phenomenon. This week, the New York Times ran a story about two Navy fighter pilots who had multiple encounters with strange objects which seemed to perform impossible maneuvers. In one dramatic case, the pilots recounted a story of an object that looked like a “sphere encasing a cube” that flew in-between two fighter jets cruising in tandem just 100 feet apart.

These stories have been covered on all the major news networks and are making headlines around the world.

UFOs have always been fodder for the mainstream media. One can easily find news reports about flying saucers from the 1950s and alleged alien abductees have even appeared on Oprah from time to time. The difference between then and now is that UFOs have begun to slowly leave the gutter of tabloid journalism. The subculture of UFO enthusiasts and researchers seems to be pushing back hard against the stereotypes and taboos established by a mainstream culture that once wrote them off as crazy or conspiracy theorists.

Ryan Sprague, a Manhattan-based UFO researcher, author, podcaster and co-host of The CW’s popular Roswell: Mysteries Decoded is the embodiment of the new UFO generation. He and other young Ufologists perceive the UFO community and discourse as counter-cultural, subversive even.

“The community has always strived for legitimacy, but at the end of the day, they didn’t care what people thought about them or their theories, no matter how outlandish or ridiculous," Sprague told Motherboard. "And now, just like any revolution, UFOs have earned the spotlight after being ridiculed for so long. UFOs exist. Our government and military have admitted it. Now we take that next step and ask the hard questions.”

In my book, The UFO People: A Curious Culture, I present the idea that the UFO subculture has always been, and will continue to be, a group of dissidents who challenge established systems of power and ideology. The problem is that mainstream culture has always believed that people who believe in UFOs are uneducated, conspiratorial and delusional. That is, until now: With the Navy's recent revelations, many in the UFO community have been vindicated.

So why is no one freaking out about these revelations making front page news? As UFO author Chris Rutkowski once explained, perhaps it is because we have become acclimatized to seeing UFOs invading Earth in books and on screen. Whether you are of the Spielberg generation, watching a candy eating E.T., or a millennial who grew up watching The Avengers fight off hordes of evil intergalactic aliens, we are used to seeing this archetypal other in our media. UFOs, as a result, have become much less frightening and perhaps much more interesting. Have we negotiated UFOs into our cultural framework and identity?

Researchers like Sprague are not the only ones being affected by this new rebranding of the UFO. Ufologists come from all walks of life. Deep Prasad is the 23-year-old CEO of ReactiveQ, a multimillion dollar quantum computing tech start-up based out of Toronto. Growing up, UFOs were never really something that interested him. But after reading a 2017 article in the New York Times that broke the existence of a secret Pentagon UFO program, he became fascinated with researching the phenomenon. While he admits that the general public may be a bit slower to appreciate the cultural importance of UFOs, many people in his network seem to be coming around.

“My friends didn't think UFOs were cool for the most part, now most of them are either skeptically intrigued or deeply excited," he said."In their eyes, it's cool but it will be a whole lot cooler when the knowledge we gain from these UFOs affects day to day life.”

Talking about UFOs still is risky business because of the stigma this type of discourse carries, but isn’t this how all new movements begin? Perhaps this UFO renaissance is no different.

It seems that we can no longer question the existence of UFOs, and while the source of these strange objects is still up for debate, we are undoubtedly on the edge of something very new, incredibly cool, and very much in the hands of a brand new generation.



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Monthly Horoscope: Pisces, June 2019

As light and airy as Gemini energy is, Gemini season is a complicated time for you, Pisces, finding you focused on your home and family life and reflecting on themes like privacy and security. Like Gemini, you're a mutable sign, always moving and coming up with new ideas—however, this time of year, you often find yourself looking back and slipping into your more sentimental, nostalgic moods. As the sun traverses Gemini, this is a magical time to reconnect with yourself and your past, your family and roots, and to energetically cleanse your home. Do some spring cleaning—Cancer season is around the corner, and you'll be partying up a storm soon!

The month opens on an intense and passionate note, as sweet Venus in gentle Taurus connects with Pluto, the lord of the underworld, in Capricorn on June 2. This is a potent time for communication and extremely deep conversations come your way. It's also a powerful bonding moment for your social life. It's hard for most of us to be vulnerable in a healthy way; we can be too guarded, or not guarded enough! As harmony-loving Venus dances with Pluto, the planet of depth, the energy is conducive for intimacy. People who shy away from intensity will feel called to touch its edges, and those who thrive in it will have a fantastic time!

A fresh start arrives with the new moon in Gemini on June 3, especially in your home and family life. You might be moving or changing something in your living situation. This a great time to clear out the energy in your home, mop up with some uncrossing floor wash, and toss out old junk. A long phone call with a family member (blood or chosen) for some juicy gossip or reminiscing is also in order. Gemini is all about communication, but during this full moon, we collectively feel like we don't have the answers (I blame the upcoming Jupiter/Neptune square, which we'll discuss later!), so if you find yourself thinking, "What the heck?" know that you're right on target. Use the energy to daydream and brainstorm, not to get frustrated because you don't have all the answers. Things are in flux!

Mercury enters fellow water sign Cancer on June 4, bringing flirtatious messages and party invitations your way! Cancer, like you, is a very intuitive sign, so expect a boost in your psychic powers, as well as more creative inspiration. Mercury connects with Uranus in Taurus on June 7, bringing surprising news and a breakthrough in communication or thinking. An unexpected message arrives. Venus enters Gemini on June 8, inspiring you to beautify your home, and this is a lovely time to invite people over to enjoy your space with you. The sun squares off with Neptune, which is in your sign, on June 9, bringing some confusion, wistfulness, and nostalgia, and the energy isn't very grounded. However, exciting shifts take place as the sun opposes Jupiter on June 10—the mood is generous, and exciting opportunities come your way.

Action planet Mars in Cancer connects with dreamy Neptune and opposes taskmaster Saturn in Capricorn on June 14, followed by Mercury doing the same on June 16. You're in an especially creative and romantic mood, Pisces, but you might find that your friends don't approve of who you're smooching, or that your boss doesn't want to invest in the project you've been dreaming up. You might find that people who have no business being bossy with you are exerting their opinion—it's time to set some clear boundaries. You might have authority figures in your life step in, and it would be wise to consider their perspective even if it poops on your party a little bit.

Neptune helps you stay in the creative flow despite the obstacles in the air, and this doesn't need to spell the end of a romance, but keep in mind that Saturn is the planet of "no," so when warrior Mars tried to break down its wall or when communication planet Mercury tries to negotiate, hard stops are faced. This isn't the time to ask for a favor or raise or to make a bold move. Pace yourself, heed the advice of your elders, and know that rejection is in the air. Keep dreaming and creating, and know that any "no's" that come your way aren't the end for you and your dreams; they're just redirecting you.

Your two ruling planets, Jupiter and Neptune, square off with each other on June 16. This is the second of three squares between these two planets this year. The first was January 13, and the next is September 21. This year, long transit finds you reckoning with your hopes, fantasies, and delusions concerning home and identity. It's crucial that you come down to earth as you examine these emotionally charged topics. You might find that you want to believe in something or someone (perhaps a lover or family member) so badly that you fall for a scam, ignore red flags, or otherwise get let down. A gentle balance needs to be struck now because if you lean too far into skepticism, it's possible that you'll end up paranoid. Knowing what's true feels difficult at this moment, but this is also a potent time to examine your beliefs, grow your creativity, work things out in therapy, and bond on a deep level with your close friends and family. If you've put your faith someplace it doesn't belong, you will be let down...but at least you'll be closer to the truth. Is ignorance bliss? This is an important thing for you to consider at this time. Know that just because one person or situation disappoints you, you're at least not doomed to repeat the experience again—and, dear Pisces, some very fun times are on the way later this month as the sun enters Cancer!

There's a full moon in Sagittarius on June 17, which is major for your career. So much of your focus has been on your personal and home life, but you're totally focused on the spotlight at this time. Emotions about your goals and reputation come to the surface, and you may finally be releasing a project into the world, and it's giving you big feelings. This is an important time to consider the balance between your public and personal lives. It might seem like it's not a big deal right now, but as you grow in fame and fortune, figuring out when to leave the office in the office and what things to keep private will become more important!

Saturn connects with Neptune and Mercury meets Mars on June 18, creating a supportive energy—especially in your social life—and boosting your energy as you embark on a new creative project. It's also a juicy time for romance! But things get difficult as Mercury and Mars oppose Pluto on June 19; watch out for quick tempers, jealousy, and even manipulative behavior. A situation that's been brewing suddenly reaches peak drama. Control issues are especially evident at this time. It's a good idea to bring in a third party to help mediate! Pay close attention to the conversations, plans, and ideas that come up between the start of Mercury's pre-retrograde shadow period on June 20 and the start of its retrograde on July 7. These themes—especially concerning love, creativity, and scheduling—will be reworked until August 1.

Neptune retrograde begins in your sign on June 21, so make extra time to rest. Be gentle with yourself, and nourish your soul with art, music, and fantasy. It's a great time for journaling and meditation. It's not a great time to binge watch horror movies or alien conspiracy documentaries because the energy can get paranoid, and it's truly not worth it, Pisces. Also on June 21, Cancer season begins! This is one of the funnest times of year for you, dear fish, as the sun illuminates the sector of your chart that rules celebrations, fertility, fun, love, and creativity—basically, all the best stuff! Things are especially dreamy as Venus opposes Jupiter on June 23 and squares off with Neptune on June 24, but watch out for over indulgences—things feel so good that it's easy to want more, more, more, and wake up the next day wondering why you overdid it!

Mercury enters fire sign Leo on June 26, helping you get organized and inspiring you to use that planner you bought because it was so cute, but that you never use because you've been too busy. Yes, Mercury retrograde is around the corner, so you'll erase and rewrite plenty of the items on your to-do list, but better that than losing track of time and your responsibilities. The month wraps up with the sun connecting with rebel Uranus on June 27, bringing unexpected news your way—a feeling of freedom is in the air! Good luck this month, Pisces, and see you in July!



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Robert Christgau Reviews Dub Master Lee 'Scratch' Perry

The self-proclaimed "Dean of American Rock Critics," Robert Christgau was one of the pioneers of music criticism as we know it—the music editor of the Village Voice from 1974 to 1985 and its chief music critic for several decades after that. At the Voice he created both the annual Pazz & Jop Critics’ Poll and his monthly Consumer Guides. Christgau was one of the first critics to write about hip-hop and the only one to review Simon & Garfunkel's Bridge Over Troubled Water with one word: "Melodic." He taught at New York University between 1990 and 2016, and has published eight books, including his 2015 memoir Going Into the City . His most recent, Book Reports: A Music Critic on His First Love, Which Was Reading, is now available from Duke University Press. Every Friday we run Expert Witness, the weekly version of the Consumer Guide he launched in 2010. To find out more, read his welcome post; for almost five decades of critical reviews, check out his regularly updated website.

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Lee "Scratch" Perry: Rainford (On-U Sound) Riddled with reissues, collaborations, bootlegs, remixes, and of course dubs, the Upsetter's catalogue is beyond comprehension. Post 2011, when he turned 75, Wikipedia lists 13 albums while omitting more titles than I'm mad enough to compare-and-contrast from Spotify's offerings; upsetter.net credits 30 undated albums to "Lee Perry" and 12 more to "Lee Perry &"; etc. But if you care about the greatest of the dubmasters, this project, overseen for the 84-year-old by great white dubmaster Adrian Sherwood, is an album that holds together. Is there a single track as head-turning as, to name a few personal faves, "I Am a Psychiatrist," "Messy Appartment," or "Poop Song"? Definitely the "Autobiography of the Upsetter" finale, possibly the "Cricket on the Moon" opener, but in the end it doesn't matter, because all nine tracks achieve both solidity and differentiation—sound good without sounding too much like any of the others. Take a wild guess and thank Sherwood, whose 1983 African Head Charge release Drastic Season has won my ears and heart as I've done my due diligence. I'll never know where this album stands or sprawls in Perry's oeuvre, But I do know that it will now replace 2006's Panic in Babylon as my go-to Upsetter. A MINUS

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Tanya Tagaq: Toothsayer (Six Shooter) On a widely streamable not-(yet?)-for-sale EP commissioned to add aural buzz to the British National Maritime Museum's "Polar Worlds" exhibit, the throat-singing Inuk avant-gardist assumes all vocal and compositional responsibilities. No hip-hop, no Nirvana covers, not even any male-sounding shamanistic croaks—the closest analogy is Fluxus-period Yoko Ono with the disruptive techniques referencing content more concrete, organic, and political than shock for education's sake or existential despair. We can hear this because we know how urgently Tagaq cares about both global warming and indigenous peoples. For half an hour she emits dozens of nonverbal sounds well beyond croons and screams—squeaks, belches, agonized gutturals, many more. This is music that mourns the end of the world. She wants it to disturb us, and it should. A MINUS

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Sneaks: Highway Hypnosis (Merge) Former Shitstain Eva Moolchan's 2016 album was one-woman minimalist rock of real but limited charm. Here she goes electro-experimental and expands the music exponentially, so that it coheres sonically even though every track is different—here charming and there disruptive, here droney and there catchy (or maybe both, like the dubwise 1:39 "Addis"). The atmospheric "Beliefs" repeats the mantra "Remove your beliefs and start again" seven times in 2:42 as if shaken to the core by whoever inspired the 56-second mantra "Holy Cow I Never Saw a Girl Like Her." Half an hour of musical whimsy that never waits long enough to get old. A MINUS



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How One of Mexico’s Biggest Cartels Is Trying to Dominate Mexico's Wildest West

CARTEL CHRONICLES is an ongoing series of dispatches from the front lines of the drug war in Latin America.

In a video circulating around the Mexican internet, two dozen trucks and cars line up one behind the other on a country road, their engines revving. In the back of the pick-ups sit heavily armed men, their faces obscured with scarves adorned with skull prints. Other men holding long guns stand on the road, the doors of their cars open until the guy filming orders them to get in. Doors slam shut, tires spin on the gravel road, and someone shouts “Viva Nueva Generacion!”

On the sides of nearly every vehicle are imprinted the letters CJNG—Cartel Jalisco Nueva Generation, one of Mexico's two most powerful drug cartels. The blatant show of force and social media push is part of the cartel’s latest bid for new territory along Mexico’s southwestern coast. The cartel’s home state of Jalisco and other claimed territories are north of Michoacán, which it now wants to dominate too. As a result, gun battles between criminal factions and assaults on police and military patrols are breaking out nearly every day.

“This is a challenge to the new government [of Mexico President Andres Manuel Lopez Obrador],” said Ricardo Rafael, an author, journalist and security analyst.

The video of the branded trucks emerged hours before a gunfight in the city of Zamora in the southern state of Michoacán. In the early hours of Sunday, May 26, four policemen were killed and further nine hospitalized when they were ambushed by what local media referred to as "armed civilians" in some 30 pickups marked CJNG. A month earlier, the local police chief was gunned down in the same town, and on May 22, some nine people were killed during a gunfight—allegedly between rival crime gangs—in the city of Uruapan, a two hour drive away. Further reports emerged this week of armed confrontations between the CJNG and a group called Las Viagras that left more dead on both sides.

In the same week, a group of soldiers came under fire from armed men in a town called La Huacana. Press reports said the armed aggressors (presumably drug gang members) fled after trying to repel the soldiers, but that villagers acting in defence of the gangsters detained the soldiers and their weapons for a few hours. The event was captured on cell phone video. The disarming of soldiers in Mexico is very rare, and the incident is an example of how embedded and supported organized crime is in some rural communities, as well as the lack of a rule of law.

Michoacán is one of Mexico’s most troubled states in the context of the country’s more than decade-long drug war. Avocado fields co-exist with clandestine poppy and marijuana plantations. Meth labs, and increasingly fentanyl labs, dot the hills in these humid lands. Civilian uprisings made headlines in 2013 and 2014, when self-defense groups took up arms in what they saw as an absence of adequate state protection to defend themselves against the violent, repressive drug cartels who were extorting, raping, pillaging and killing local people. Yet many cartel members often came from the same communities that rose up against them, which sometimes created shady alliances between the two sides.

The large-scale self-defense movement in Michoacán, which was one of the focuses of the Oscar-nominated documentary Cartel Land, eventually fell apart after it was co-opted by the government, but small auto-defensa groups continue to exist. Hipolito Mora, who founded one of the most prominent self-defense groups in 2013, said that many were co-opted and financed—these are humble, impoverished communities—by the cartels and functioned as armed wings of local criminal cells. The CJNG drug trafficking organization is in the process of intimidating and battling smaller local trafficking groups such as Las Viagras to take control, according to Mora, so wants as many armed allies as it can get. Alliances between different crime syndicates that existed during and up until this point in time are now being declared over by the latest assaults credited to the CJNG.

“We are living levels of violence that we have never seen,” Mora told VICE from his hometown of La Ruana in Michoacán. “More than anything, it’s due to the weakness of the government down here. They need to do more.”

Michoacán has long been contested territory in the country’s crime wars. In addition to being an important production and cultivation zone for drugs, the state is home to the international seaport of Lazaro Cardenas, a key arrival point for precursor chemicals sent from Asia to make methamphetamine and fentanyl. But recent events suggest that the CJNG, which the United States government declared a public enemy in October last year, is further expanding its organization across Mexico’s Western coast, where it already dominates in equally drug-productive states such as Colima, Nayarit and Jalisco. The criminal organization is considered by the United States Drug Enforcement Administration to be as powerful a threat as Joaquin “el Chapo” Guzman’s Sinaloa Cartel.

“The message this week from the CJNG [to rival gangs] is that 'we’re much more powerful and have more control and weaponry so don’t mess with us,'" Rafael said. "The message is also to the federal government.”

Falco Ernst, head investigator for the International Crisis Group in Mexico, has spent time in Michoacán doing fieldwork on the cartels and their impact on civilians. He said that local, criminal cells may not be so willing to roll over when confronted by the CJNG, to whom Michoacán is not home.

"I wouldn’t like to die without seeing a government that is strong and intelligent and dedicated to giving us the peace we need"

“Local groups are deeply embedded in their own communities and have their own intelligence," Ernst said. "There have been attempts to take over territories and push into that zone, but both the geography of the state—it’s very rugged—and ties to local populations has made that impossible to pull that off.”

That may be, but the CJNG seems to be bedding in for a fight. Rafael anticipates the cartel achieving a hegemonic rule, rather than power share, over Michoacán and says the other smaller groups don’t possess the man or firepower to repel them. “CJNG wants to come to an agreement that they control the zone completely," he said. "They are experts in territorial control and this is their way of ejecting their rivals.”

The federal government did not provide an interview on the future of security in Michoacán when contacted by VICE. Public Security Minister Alfonso Durazo has said publicly that the new elite police force, the National Guard, won’t be sent to the beleaguered Mexican state until July, leaving citizens feeling as though they have to fend for themselves, at least until then. State governor Silvano Aureoles announced a new security push in the city of Zamora after the violent standoff, but has also asked for more support from federal forces.

But whilst the government gets its act together, could the state see a resurgence of the civilian armed groups that marauded these lands five years ago? Security analyst Jaime Lopez hopes not: “Having people with guns outside the law roaming your community always leads to trouble eventually."

So far, Mora has no intention of regathering his civilian troops, although a small number of others have. This time, he’s putting his bets on the government, despite their delayed reaction to the new spike in violence.

“I wouldn’t like to die without seeing a government that is strong and intelligent and dedicated to giving us the peace we need,” said Mora.

Follow Deborah Bonello on Twitter.



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Monthly Horoscope: Aquarius, June 2019

Gemini season is such a fun, light, and flirty time of year for you, dear Aquarius! You're stereotyped as the rebel of the zodiac, and as cool and aloof and aloof as you are, sometimes people see you as heavy, burdened with responsibility or encumbered by emotion. This is lifted as the sun prances through loquacious air sign Gemini. Creative inspiration flows, romance is the air, and you're in the mood to party! You're able to set your responsibilities aside, and the existential dread you carry is shelved for the moment.

But that doesn't mean you won't have profound connections and emotional revelations this month. Sweet Venus in Taurus connects with Pluto, the lord of the underworld, in Capricorn on June 2, which is intense and sexy, transformative, and ultimately...freeing! We all have habits and patterns that we do unconsciously, things that were programmed long ago as coping mechanisms. This is a profound time for you to move through complex, old, and hidden patters to process and release them. You're returning home in many ways at the start of this month. Not to where you grew up... but home to yourself.

A fresh start arrives with the new moon in Gemini on June 3. A new creative project is brewing, the sparks are rekindled in your relationship, or you may meet someone new! Gemini is a sign that's all about communication, and famous for asking plenty of questions, and you have plenty of questions during this new moon. Your questions won't be answered immediately. This month is more about creating vision boards, daydreaming, and brainstorming rather than seeking hard answers or serious planning. Let yourself have fun...that's all the new moon wants from you!

Communication planet Mercury enters water sign Cancer on June 4, helping you get organized and plan your schedule, and bringing news about work. Mercury makes a helpful connection to your ruling planet Uranus, which is currently in Taurus, on June 7, bringing surprising news your way as well as a eureka moment. As much as being organized is important to you, you always appreciate a random turn of events to inject some excitement and inspiration into your everyday life.

More flirtatious energy flows as Venus enters Gemini on June 8—expect plenty of cute banter to take place! Venus in Gemini also brings creative inspiration, however, the sun squares off with Neptune in Pisces on June 9 and opposes Jupiter in Sagittarius on June 10, which may find you confused about how you want to spend your time and energy. Don't let yourself get so confused that you end up over-booking yourself and over-spending. It's OK to take your time to figure out what's important to you. Just isn't the time to rush—you can expect some drama and excitement to pop up in your social life during this time of the month!

Mars in Cancer makes a harmonious connection with Neptune and opposes Saturn in Capricorn on June 14. Mercury does the same on June 16. What does this mean for you, Aquarius? You feel like you have everything you need to go for your dreams, but there is an invisible, ambiguous block that's preventing you from moving forward. Honestly, it could just be that you need more sleep. You've been working very hard with Mars in tenacious Cancer, and on a cosmic level, the universe might be putting on the breaks because you can't add anymore to your to-do list. Your heart, brain, and soul need sleep!

Also on June 16, Jupiter squares off with Neptune, which is a very complicated energy. On one hand, it's magical and finds you connecting with inspiring people, but on the other, Neptune is the planet of delusion and fantasy, and too-big promises may be made at this time. It's not easy to stay grounded during this transit, but it's important that you keep things light and make the best of it. Now isn't the time to place bets. Enjoy yourself and don't make any commitments just yet.

The full moon in Sagittarius lands on June 17, which is major for your social life! A situation that's been brewing finally bursts. A little drama isn't enough to rattle an Aquarius, and what you'll learn during this emotionally turbulent time is people's truths, as fire sign Sagittarius is all about authenticity. You yourself are learning more about your hopes and dreams for the future, as well as your ideals and truths.

Saturn connects with Neptune and Mercury meets Mars June 18, helping you tap into your intuitive abilities and finding you in an especially productive mood, slaying your personal and professional to-do list. But things get complicated as Mercury and Mars oppose Pluto on June 19, and you have to be especially careful of outbursts and arguments. Tempers are quick to flare. A situation or a plan may be cut off, and the mood is impatient and rash. You may also be surprised by what upsets you on this day. Watch out for shady or manipulative people; bringing in a third party to help mediate is a great idea. Mercury enters its pre-retrograde shadow on June 20, so pay close attention to the plans and topics that come up in conversation—especially those concerning relationships and your schedule or daily routine—between then and the start of the retrograde on July 7. These are themes the retrograde will find you reconsidering and reworking until August 1.

Neptune retrograde begins on June 21, finding you reflecting on the meaning of wealth, and encouraging you to tap into the energy of abundance—it's a wonderful time to meditate on all the things you're thankful for. Cancer season also begins on June 21! Cancer season is a busy time of year for you, and if you're looking for a new gig or a way to get organized at work, the sun's time in nurturing water sign Cancer is a fantastic time to do so. This is also a great time for you to check in with yourself when it comes to wellness and your habits. How do you want to nourish yourself this Cancer season?

Excitement arrives as Venus opposes Jupiter on June 23 and squares off with Neptune on June 24—it's a magical time that's fantastic for connecting with friends and lovers, socializing, and branching out. You're feeling so inspired, Aquarius! Just watch out for issues concerning money; be realistic about your spending and budgeting. So much fun is in the air, but this is an easy time to overindulge. Mercury enters your opposite sign Leo on June 26, bringing news your way and boosting communication in your partnerships. The sun connects with your ruling planet Uranus to bring surprises on June 27—a change in your routine is here! Good luck this month, Aquarius, and see you in July!



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Finding Asian Identity in a Black and White America

The first time I felt ashamed of being Asian, I was six years old. It was my first day in the first grade at a new, predominantly white school, where I was surrounded by people who didn’t look like me. But as I was sitting on the swings alone, a young Chinese boy approached—the first fellow Asian I’d seen.

“Hi! Are you new here?” he asked.

His voice didn’t sound like mine, or those of any of the kids at the Chinese-English kindergarten I had attended until then. It sounded purely American.

“First day,” I said shyly, my accent thick and unforgiving.

He frowned at my response, then ran off, beckoned by his group of white friends. I was left confused by my own feelings—not yet able to understand how someone who looked so much like me could feel so different.

Alone, I watched his group of friends and wondered how I could be more like them.

For as long as I can remember, I’ve struggled to figure out what being Asian American is supposed to mean. What I learned early on is that it’s defined by liminality—always positioned in reference to another, more dominant culture; it rarely feels distinct and coherent enough to stand alone.

Being Asian in America means being part of one of the most diverse and racial groups in the country. Unlike members of most other minority communities in the U.S., my racial makeup alone—half-Indonesian, half-Chinese—determines very little about the spaces and environments in which I’ll end up. In fact, Asian Americans are the least likely of all minorities to live in homogenous neighborhoods—while the average white American often resides in neighborhoods that are 75% white and nearly 75% of Black Americans attend majority minority schools. We have the largest income gap of all ethnicities in the country. All this fluidity means we’re uniquely flexible—easily able to both disappear into privilege or to stand with the oppressed.

It’s long been unclear where Asian Americans stand within America’s Black-white binary—a racial paradigm that’s existed for centuries. In “Latinos/as, Asian Americans, and the Black-White Binary,” scholar Linda Martin Alcoff notes that the first time “Black” and “white” were defined in the U.S. was through an 1854 Supreme Court case. That year, George Hall—a white man—was convicted of murder based on the eyewitness testimony of a Chinese American. But Hall’s lawyer argued that Chinese people were simply ancestors of “Indians,” meaning Native Americans, since they were both from Asia—and thus possessed no rights in court. The Supreme Court took the case a step further and used it to define the Black-white binary: “‘Black’ must mean ‘non-white’ and ‘white’ must exclude all people of color. Thus by law of binary logic, Chinese Americans, after having become Native American, then also became black,” Alcoff writes.

Over the next 150 years after that ruling, Chinese Americans continued to be tossed—both in legislation and in practice—onto either side of the binary, until officially determined by the U.S. Supreme Court to be “non-white” in 1927. According to Alcoff, the Black-white paradigm has long prevented many ethnic groups from defining their own identity.

Today, that inability to self-define still lingers. And many, including myself at times, turn to assimilation—sometimes veering into appropriation—to reconcile it. Growing up without many examples of Asian-American identity, I watched many of my friends and family get pulled toward either whiteness or Blackness in place of developing their own cultural belonging. Chinese girls at my middle school highlighted their hair and pretended not to know Cantonese. Indian boys at my high school wore snapbacks and blasted Kendrick’s Good Kid, M.A.A.D. City.

A brief look at prominent Asian-American figures in pop culture offers further proof of this phenomenon: Eddie Huang—a chef and author who’s been criticized for his insensitive comments about Asian men being so emasculated in America that they’re “basically treated like Black women”—has expressed how, throughout his life, he’s felt like an outsider in both Chinese and White-American culture. Instead, growing up, Huang said he identified much more closely with Blackness. Meanwhile, Queens, NY-raised actress and rapper Awkwafina came under fire last year for her use of a “blaccent” in Crazy Rich Asians. Some fans defended her mannerisms as a byproduct of growing up around Black communities, but critics argued that her persona was performative. And in 2018, Asian-American hip-hop collective 88Rising made waves as a breakthrough force in broadening Asian presence in music. But the collective has also been criticized for its cultural insensitivity—like Rich Brian originally going by “Rich Chigga.”

On the other side of the spectrum, many Asian Americans have sided with the predominantly white movement to strike down Affirmative Action in universities—disenfranchising Black, Latinx, and even Southeast Asian communities in the process. Certain Chinese Americans called the 2014 indictment of police officer Peter Liang in the fatal shooting of Akai Gurley “scapegoating,” implying that Chinese Americans should be afforded “all the privileges offered a white cop who had taken the life of a Black person,” as AAPI scholar Jeff Chang wrote in his 2016 book We Gon’ Be Alright. And despite frequent talk about dismantling the “model minority” myth today, few know that East-Asian Americans actually helped originate that stereotype—intentionally portraying themselves as “upstanding citizens” who could assimilate into the white mainstream of 1940s postwar America.

But where, in all this, is the part that’s distinctly ours? Where does the binary end, and where do we begin?

“I think a lot of younger folks right now are much more aware of the need to place themselves in [America’s landscape],” Jeff Chang tells me. “And it raises these questions: How are we gonna choose to make ourselves visible? When we stand, who do we stand with? I think that those issues are much more front of mind for your generation than it was for mine, who was just trying to get ourselves heard.”

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From first grade until my mid-teens, I felt incredible pressure to act white. My life was separated into two non-intersecting pieces: My home in the San Gabriel Valley, one of the largest Asian enclaves in L.A., and my school in Pasadena, where rich whites dominated the old and new money landscape. I wanted so badly to fit into the latter that I pretended the former didn’t exist.

For years, I didn’t use chopsticks, refused to speak Chinese, tried to wear shoes in my home, never brought leftovers to school, and even claimed to dislike boba. I was embarrassed on the rare occasions friends came over and saw my dad lighting incense or my mom speaking on the phone in Indonesian.

That all started to change when I turned 16 and began roaming Downtown LA’s art scene, meeting Latinx, Filipinx, Black, and even white friends who helped me break out of my racial-binary thinking. Slowly, I shed the Black-white lens by which I defined myself and began to explore what it actually meant to be Asian American. Today, I’m still doing that unlearning, and I’m seeing a broader, cultural unlearning starting to happen alongside me.

Over the last few years, we’ve seen Asian Americans amplifying a distinct cultural identity on an unprecedented scale. Artists like Mitski and Swet Shop Boys are bringing songs about the Asian-American experience into genres like indie and hip-hop. Bao—a Pixar short that explores Asian-American family dynamics through an immigrant mother’s relationship with an animated dumpling—won an Oscar this year. Collectives like Asian-American filmmaking group Wong Fu Productions and those behind AAPI magazines Banana Mag and Slant’d are popping up all over the country. And distinctly Asian-American dishes like Roy Choi and Mark Manguera’s Korean taco are now street food staples.

Boba Guys, a national brand known for its artisanal take on the Taiwanese tapioca-filled drink, is another unmistakably Asian-American product. But when the company first launched in 2013, co-founders Bin Chen and Andrew Chau received a lot of backlash for their Americanized version of boba. “We took it really hard in the beginning when people would say that Boba Guys is not authentic—but then we were like, authentic to what? Andrew’s an Asian kid in New Jersey; I was the only Asian kid in Wharton, Texas. This was our experience,” Chen shares. “We exist in this area between East and West, and we should really celebrate that.”

Perhaps Asian-American identity doesn’t have to be entirely distinct. By nature, the Asian-American experience is an ongoing act of hybridization—and that can be beautifully productive. It doesn’t have to look like assimilation or appropriation, as long as we’re respectful and mutually giving to any marginalized cultures that inform our own.

Chang, a celebrated hip-hop historian, agrees. “You can step into the cypher—and this is something that you see in African-American and Indigenous cultures, that there’s a sense of radical welcome,” Chang says. “And if you're welcomed into a house, you don't go in and trash it. You don't go in and steal things. You acknowledge the welcome, and you recognize the debt that you owe.”

Despite the need for intentionality, there’s no reason that this movement can’t happen authentically. For instance, emerging South-Asian-American pop musician Josephine Shetty—better known as Kohinoorgasm—feels a profound connection to the underground music scene she was brought up in. As she gains traction as an Asian-American artist, she has no plans of leaving behind the marginalized communities that have continually supported her craft. “I love the bands I play with, the spaces I get to be a part of and contribute to. I just feel like, How can I not give them everything I can?” Shetty explains. “I feel like any knowledge I gain, any instrument I buy, any skill that I learn—I have to share with someone who doesn’t have access to that.”

Right now, we’re at a pivotal moment where it feels possible to transcend the age-old immigrant Asian mentality of “scarcity,” as Chen put it, that has historically kept us from supporting others both within and outside of our own community. Rather than hold tightly to what we perceive as ours, we can—and should—share in the abundance with communities around us.

As I grow into my mid-20s, I’m discovering that, for me, finding Asian-American identity means confronting, with care and humility, the in-between of race in America. It means seeing my position not as one defined by lack, but as one rich with the potential for collaboration, solidarity, and giving back. And as we—as a community—start telling our stories at increasingly amplified volumes, I hope that this emerging orientation helps us recognize the power that we possess in defining who we are and who we want to be.

I hope that it helps us find comfort in the liminal, that it helps us, finally, stop seeing ourselves in black and white.



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Monthly Horoscope: Capricorn, June 2019

Virgo is often considered the most organized sign of the zodiac—however, dear Capricorn, I would argue that you're more tidy and efficient! You love your planners and notebooks, you have an eye for detail, you're all about functionality and sustainability (like Virgo! I will give them their credit!) and since you're ruled by curmudgeonly Saturn, nearly nothing sparks enough joy for you to keep it around and tidy up later. (What does spark joy for a Capricorn? Hot sex, solid friendships, and killing it in their career; all things that can't be organized in a filing cabinet.) However, dear Capricorn, I must warn you: Things won't be so organized this month...they'll get messy, but creativity flows, and as long as you can retire your inner control freak for a while, you can have a very productive month brainstorming and brewing up plans.

The month opens on a transformative and sexy note, as sweet, sensual, and delicious Venus in Taurus makes a harmonious connection with Pluto, which is currently in your sign, on June 2. This is a magical time for your love life, as deep bonding takes place. This is also an intensely creative time for you, so expect your writer's block to be broken. The energy is intense yet intriguing—you're feeling pulled toward something, magnetized rather than repulsed, which is often an issue with Pluto, the planet that rules the underworld. In perfumery, scents that don't smell good or even smell repulsive turn into something completely enchanting when mixed with the right substance, which is big Venus/Pluto energy! Don't be surprised if something unexpected turns you on artistically or otherwise.

There's a new moon in Gemini on June 3, activating the sector of your chart that rules your daily routines and rituals. This is a lovely time to kick a habit! A fresh start is also here in your day job. That said, things won't feel so immediately clear, so don't expect the new moon to come and square everything away. Take it slow, Capricorn; this whole month brings reorganization, some confusion, and a touch of fantasy. Mercury enters your opposite sign Cancer on June 4, boosting communication between you and your partners, and surprising news and a-ha moments arrive as Mercury connects with Uranus in Taurus on June 7.

Venus enters Gemini on June 8, helping you whistle while you work—easygoing energy flows at work and you're running into cuties as you do your errands. This is a fantastic time for a spa treat (DIY or otherwise), too. The sun squares off with hazy Neptune in Pisces on June 9 and opposes Jupiter in Sagittarius on June 10—confusion is in the air, so be very careful not to overbook yourself because you need your rest! You take pride in how busy you keep, but major burnout could take place if you're not smart about expending your energy at this time.

Mars in Cancer connects with dreamy Neptune and opposes taskmaster Saturn on June 14, and Mercury does the same on June 16, creating a complicated dance around connecting and communication. You have a lot of boundaries to assert while trying to be flexible and empathic to other people's needs. It's a tough balance to strike! Complicating matters—or helping you check out of the situation entirely, depending on how you look at it—is Jupiter squaring off with Neptune on June 16. You're in a hazy, sleepy mood, and your mind needs rest. This is frustrating if you're trying to get organized and push conversations forward, but it's fantastic for unplugging, resting, meditating, and letting your imagination run free...just not too free, because we don't want you to get caught up in paranoia. Neptune rules fantasy, but it also rules delusion, and Jupiter is all about expansion, sometimes making things seem bigger than they really are. Some general advice for this planetary influence, and for this month in general, is that "I don't know right now, I'm figuring it out" is a valid response.

There's a full moon in Sagittarius on June 17, illuminating parts of yourself you've forgotten, hidden, or didn't know were there. Full moons are emotionally sensitive periods, and if you've been bottling up your emotions, expect them to come pouring out during this fiery full moon. Let the tears flow—what you're processing might not make total sense to you, but your body is wise, so allow it to move through your emotions as necessary. Over-intellectualizing things won't help, even though there's a desire to make sense of things at this time, to make plans and sort things out. Let things be a little messy and come into place. You're releasing a lot right now, and you're feeling tender as the light of Sagittarius's fire illuminates secrets and spaces you usually don't spend time in. Watch out for messages that arrive in your dreams, and make extra time for journaling and meditation. Your intuition is especially activated during this full moon!

Saturn makes a helpful connection with Neptune and Mercury meets Mars June 18, and the atmosphere is supportive and creative as you and your partners push conversations forward. Just watch out for power struggles and bad tempers as Mercury and Mars oppose Pluto on June 19. This is a smart time to bring in an unbiased third party to mediate an issue that could bring out you and your partner's worst sides, like jealousy, possessiveness, and shady behavior. If you've been arguing with someone, it may come to a head now. People are often on their best behavior when a crowd is watching. It's easier to send a rude text than to say something to someone's face. Keep that in mind as you navigate difficult people and situations during this time.

Mercury enters its pre-retrograde shadow on June 20, so pay close attention to the ideas, conversations, and plans discussed between then and the beginning on the retrograde on July 7. These themes will be reworked or delayed during the retrograde, which ends on August 1. This Mercury retrograde is major for your relationships and will also touch on finances, specifically complicated money matters like debts, taxes, and inheritances. Neptune retrograde begins on June 21, which is majorly frustrating for communication... hat is, unless you're able to quiet down and listen. Trusting your intuition, taking it slow, and using the energy for play and creativity rather than detailed planning is the best way to go! Also on June 21, Cancer season begin, finding you squarely focused on your relationships. Keep a gentle approach to communication and partnering at this time, Capricorn.

Venus opposes Jupiter on June 23 and squares off with Neptune on June 24, bringing some sweet messages your way—but again, this isn't the month for clarity, so if you're feeling confused, don't let it get to you, dear Capricorn. This is a lovely time to play things by ear, try something out, and generally experiment. Don't make any promises you can't keep! That said, a lovely energy is in the atmosphere. On June 26, Mercury enters Leo, the sign that rules the heart, asking you to speak from yours. Complicated matters will be discussed now, and keep in mind that they'll also be reconsidered when Mercury retrograde begins on July 7. Surprises are also in store at the end of this month as the sun connects with Uranus on June 27—this is a fantastic time for adventure! Unexpected thrills arrive. Good luck this month, dear sea goat, and see you in July!



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Confessions of a Reddit 'Karma Whore'

In September 2017, I was browsing Reddit and came across a side-by-side photo comparison of Kim Jong-un. In the left photo, the leader was shown to be normal size, and in the right photo, he’d been photoshopped to look noticeably more thin, making him seem bizarrely agile and stringy. “Skinny Kim Jong-un would make the situation with North Korea more intimidating,” the post read. It held the number one spot on the front page for a few hours and garnered 156,000 upvotes, a massive total for a single post.

I’d been aiming to go viral on Reddit for a while, and I saw my opportunity when someone commented, “Gotta say, skinny Un would make a decent Bond villain.”

“Slim Jong Un,” I quickly replied.

My comment earned 34,700 upvotes in the hours that followed.

The scales shifted for me then. A horrible pun that took all of five seconds to conjure had led tens of thousands of people into giving me an upvote, a measure of validation and approval.

I had been lurking on Reddit for a few months and had recently begun to comment. Little did I know that this initial taste of virality would be the beginning of a years-long ascent to the top of Reddit's karma leaderboards.

*

I began my Reddit career on some of the site's true crime communities. I’d been watching groups of Reddit users in subreddits like r/UnresolvedMysteries volley around theories about unsolved crimes. It was sort of thrilling to think of the community as being on the verge of cracking a cold case. I wanted to be an internet sleuth.

I posted comments with my own interpretations of missing persons cases and perplexing murders. On the rare occasion one of my comments sparked a new conversation about a case, I felt proud, as though I’d performed real detective work.

This was during a period in my early 20s, shortly after college, when I was unexpectedly living at home, friendless and jobless. To stave off my boredom, I spent hour after hour on my computer. Reddit seemed like a place of spontaneity and excitement, and in my growing loneliness, the idea of a large community—and its thousands of subcommunities—appealed to me.

One day, a man directly involved in one of these cold cases responded to a comment I’d made. The man kindly corrected my uninformed speculation about a mother and daughter who had seemingly vanished, confirming for everyone in the comment section that the two remain missing to this day.

I read the comment and stopped, astonished. In all the time I’d spent on true crime subreddits, I’d never been directly confronted by someone involved in a case. I’d never considered that something like this was possible, that my online comments would have some sort of real-life consequences, no matter how small.

As much as Reddit had helped me to fill empty time, it exposed a more significant emptiness within me

As powerful as my interaction with the man from the cold case was, my mind kept returning to the fact that it was only a single comment on a single post in a single subreddit on a single day. I tried to calculate how many millions of discussions were taking place at the moment I made my comment, and the enormity of the sum made me feel like nothing but a blip on the radar, a shadow of a point.

Reddit, I realized, is vaster than I could imagine. It seemed sort of like magic.

In its sprawl, Reddit shapeshifts. Minute by minute, hour by hour, day by day. While no two posts are ever quite the same, synchronicities and inside jokes emerge. On Reddit, people around the world play touch-and-go with news stories, politics, memes, and their hobbies, participating in an exchange of mood and culture. It's a community that entertains itself and makes a concerted effort not to be captured by the views, angles, and attitudes of more mainstream social media.

As I explored Reddit's vastness, I decided I wanted to stay away from discussion-based subreddits and subreddits focused on news and politics altogether. After learning about the rise of incels in Reddit forums, the exchange of "jailbait," and the incident in 2013 when Redditors misidentified the Boston Marathon bombing suspects and terrorized an innocent man’s family, I decided I would stick to subreddits focused on pictures, gifs, and memes.

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I recalled users I’d seen here and there who had a gimmick, like the particularly talented poem_for_your_sprog, whose every comment is an original, themed poem in reply to a post. These types of users—and there are only a famous few—exist simply for their novelty and operate independently of Reddit’s self-righteous diatribes.

It became clear to me that my next Reddit incarnation would have a simpler purpose: to do as the jokers do. My username is dickfromaccounting; I was halfway there already.

I could post cheap puns and wisecracks in the hope of scoring fake internet points, known as karma, earned by sharing a post or making a comment that gets upvoted. It’s a way to gain a hollow kind of influence, and having a lot of karma is proof that you can repeatedly capture the attention of scores of people on a site as huge as Reddit. Amassing karma is a game of hard-fought strategy, and I wanted to win.

I started making and maintaining extensive notes in my phone, compiling bits and pieces of jokes or dialogue I’d hear while watching a video on YouTube or a show on TV.

For a while, I searched for posts through the “New” filter on popular communities that I was subscribed to, so that I could pinpoint a post that I thought would have a good chance of going viral (and would thus get more visibility and traffic for upvotes), and I could be one of the first users to leave a comment, which is another way to increase visibility. After a while, I learned to place my comments well enough to time a post’s ascent to the front page of Reddit, where only a select number of posts appear to millions of users. There, the posts would get several thousand upvotes each, translating into a few thousand karma and upping my score. I knew really successful comment-oriented users boasted karma counts in the millions, and that was a tally I was absolutely determined to match.

Just a few weeks after I began this new strategy, I made the Kim Jong Un post, and suddenly, virality didn't seem so distant a dream.

But I hesitated. Going viral had been a matter of perfect timing—how was I to possibly set myself up like this again? It occurred to me that making posts, as opposed to comments, would give my karma lure more precision: I could choose when and where the hook landed.

I became a student of the site’s complicated info-sharing dynamics. Every subreddit has a different persona with its own habits, preferences, and faults. I wanted to study them all, to learn what each one wanted and how it would respond to this type of gif or that kind of image. It felt like a sociological endeavor to study the subreddit personalities and characteristics, like I was collecting data points and observations on human behavior and identity online for no purpose other than my own digital self-gain.

I shut myself up in my room. The further I removed myself from the people I knew in the real world, the further I descended into the minds of people I’ve never interacted with and would never meet again.

One day, I was perusing the all-time most upvoted posts of r/askreddit, a community where people pose questions like “What movie is so ridiculously stupid, but you love it anyway?” and “Which conspiracy theory is so believable that it might be true?”

I noticed that there was a pattern in the phrasing of some of them, that they used the same leading approach. “How would you feel,” one of the posts asks, “about a law requiring parents that receive child support to supply the court with proof of how the child support money is being spent?” What caught me about this question is that of all the questions and ways a question that can be asked, asking someone how they feel about something is plausibly the most basic way to start a broad conversation.

There was no turning back. I was, and still am, a "karma whore."

A discussion I’d had with my Mom earlier that day came to mind. We talked about how alarming it was that a person like my grandmother, who can barely see or hear and has a lead foot, can continue to drive. “How would you feel,” I asked in my post, mimicking what I'd learned about the format, “about a law that requires people over the age of 70 to pass a specialized driving test in order to continue driving?” Within a day, the post became the most upvoted question in the history of the subreddit, raking in over 120,000 upvotes. It held the record for several months, until the real Bill Gates himself (by his username thisisbillgates) broke it with a leading question of his own.

With this record-breaking post, I’d reached the end of one plane on Reddit and found the beginning of another—the mega-viral, hundreds of comments per second, karma-ka-chinging, all-time great inspiring, fame-teasing front of the “front page of the Internet.”

There was no turning back. I was, and still am, a "karma whore."

The act of seeking karma is a sensitive issue on the site. Some users post original content, or stuff that they only make themselves. These users, Redditors will tell you, are respectable because their pursuit of karma is funded by their own work and energy. But the site’s system is volatile, and not all original content is well-received. Karma whores know this in their core. Karma whores learn to be clinical and bot-like. Karma whores make nothing themselves and often pull their content from users on other sites without crediting. This recklessness, Redditors will tell you, reveals the true emptiness dwelling inside these people.

For several months, my daily routine was monastic: as soon as I rolled out of bed, I’d open Imgur, Twitter, Instagram, and Facebook and scour for something I could post, continuing the search through the morning, afternoon, and evening until I’d rounded up at least three or four viral posts and satisfied my own made-up quota.

This was a process of trial and error. I studied the rates at which my viral posts were upvoted minute by minute, hour by hour. I posted at different times of the day to determine when users were most active. For every viral post I made, I deleted a dozen others that failed to stick. If another post was competing with mine to trend within the subreddit, I’d downvote it, and others, in an attempt to trigger the algorithm that would give mine a boost. I reached a point where, within 15 minutes of sharing it, I could tell whether or not a post would make it to the front page.

The subreddits with the most subscribers would give me the best chances of going viral, since they have the highest number of active users, meaning the highest upvote potential. Based on the type of content I’d collect on other sites—usually cute animal gifs, interesting images, and memes—I’d target popular, media-based (as opposed to text-based) subreddits for very general interest groups: r/aww for all things cute, r/pics for all photos, and r/gaming for everything about video games. Although I could predict whether or not a post would go viral, there was no real way for me to know exactly how viral it would go. The degree to which the content went viral on other sites (measured by the number of likes or upvotes) would be some indication, but it wasn’t always a clear sign. Of the 17 Reddit posts I’ve made that have topped a hundred thousand upvotes, for example, maybe half of them were proportionally viral on the other sites. What made the other half go viral on Reddit was simply a mixture of mood and momentum.

Since learning how to master the process of matching content with its best-fitting subreddit, I have gained more than 8 million karma. Of the 250 million or so users on the site, my account is ranked 13th, and I plan to crack the top 10 very soon. According to one statistical model shared in a data subreddit earlier in 2018, my posts that year reached the front page more times than any other user on the site. "The top poster, /u/dickfromaccounting, represents about 1% of all posts that reached the front page," that analysis said.

I had conquered the front page of the front page of the internet and won an anonymous fame. All problems solved, all ailments allayed, all goals achieved. Right?

I retreated to my room, where the silence of everything but my own clicking and typing and wandering mind filled the air around me. I worked in what felt like a four-walled enclosure, a laboratory and not a bedroom.

I must admit that critics of karma whores do hit a nerve. What I do is a form of thievery. I can’t deny stealing content, nor can I pretend that attention isn’t my primary motivation for doing so. The thousands of posts I’ve made throw a spotlight on my little portion of the internet, where a tiny share of the day’s digital dialogue focuses on something I place in front of people. Without my intervention, they might not have enjoyed this interesting, funny, moving, surprising bit of media. This attention, even if only on a single post for an hour or so, makes me feel powerful, like I can exercise a certain control over what occupies people’s minds.

And yet, all along, a feeling of voicelessness and meaninglessness crept beside me. I was in pursuit of a daily adrenaline shot, this singular form of power that came from watching a post rocket to the top of Reddit’s popularity ladder. Nothing else mattered. Nothing beyond my fake internet points.

Gradually, I started eating less. I saw people less. My parents and I talked less, and I retreated to my room, where the silence of everything but my own clicking and typing and wandering mind filled the air around me. I worked in what felt like a four-walled enclosure, a laboratory and not a bedroom. When my back would ache or my neck would get tight, I’d pull myself away from my computer long enough to observe the thinness of my wrists.

As much as Reddit had helped me to fill empty time, it exposed a more significant emptiness within me. Attention on Reddit, after all, is like quicksand. Every post I shared made me feel closer to getting out, but the effort that it took to make those posts plunged me deeper into the pit.

Moderation, I thought, could be my rescue. I could resort to the thing that had initially drawn me to Reddit: a sense of community. I could become one of the users who oversees posting and commenting activity on a subreddit. I could be one of the gatekeepers, the socially responsible leader who removes the rampant hate speech and sexism and bigotry, bans repeated rule-breakers, and guides the community to more civil interaction. I might not be able to purge the site of all of its evils, but at least my time on Reddit wouldn’t be spent in total self-service.

I joined the moderation team of r/iama, a subreddit where famous celebrities, scientists, politicians, and other notable figures and groups host “ask me anything” sessions, one of the largest communities on the site. I joined the teams at r/BikiniBottomTwitter, the place for SpongeBob memes, and r/oldpeoplefacebook. I joined r/WhitePeopleTwitter, a subreddit that consists mostly of jokes and observations poking fun at white people but, in the comments, sometimes devolves into a racist spam machine and requires very active moderation.

Moderating these communities and doing my part to keep them clean and amicable does give my fascination with Reddit a bit more meaning. I know that maybe I could play some role in helping someone—a person like me passing time on their computer—feel as though the world is not always out to get them.

But emptying the site of all hatred and apathy is impossible. Every time I open the moderation tab, no matter how many times a day, new posts and comments have been reported for one reason or another. The cycle never stops, and how could it? Users wield their anonymity like a regenerative get-out-of-jail-free card, continually renewing the choice to be selfish and inconsiderate without facing any immediate consequences.

Moderators are supposed to perform the grunt work for the company, handling the day-to-day site maintenance and operation without compensation. It’s thankless work, even though moderators are the users plugging and replugging the same hole in a ship that’s perpetually taking on water. And as the Reddit public has informed me many times, I’m not only attention-hungry as a karma whore, I'm also power-hungry like all moderators. There seems to be no way to redeem myself.

By now, I know that my thinking is tinged with this strange, digital stardom. I’ve seen my posts, the work of my amused fingers, hold the attention of a sliver of the world. I’ve owned and managed places on the internet where people from all walks of life come together to talk. I’ve exceeded every goal and exacted every plan that I established for myself when I committed to wasting time on Reddit.

And now that my fame has brought me here, I find, more and more, that I’m in oddly familiar territory: As the days slog on, I can see that most of the rocks are turned over. There are very few corners left for me to check. The effort that began as a trek away from time spent by myself has, in its own time, returned me to my point of origin. I am certainly more viral-savvy for having made this online journey. I probably know people and their media consumption habits better than most. But even here, at the top of Reddit, with all the attention I’ve ever wanted, I am no less alone.



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The Murder of Charlene Downes, the British Schoolgirl Who Vanished Without a Trace

VICE U.K. originally published this article.

Though her body has never been found, Charlene Downes haunts the town of Blackpool in England. Ask a local their thoughts on the then 14-year-old's disappearance and they'll respond with anger. Sometimes this anger is racist in tone, sometimes it's not—but it's always intense. It's the kind of anger that borders on dangerous. It's been stoked over the years by misinformation and rumor, fertilized by inertia and cowardice, co-opted for malevolent agendas that have nothing to do with justice.

Born in 1989, vanished on Saturday, November 1, 2003, Charlene Downes has now been missing for over 15 years. Her disappearance remains Lancashire Police's most high-profile missing person inquiry.

Charlene lived on Buchanan Street, in the Talbot electoral division of Blackpool, with her parents, Karen and Robert Downes. She had two sisters, loved the pop group Westlife, and was a fan of Darren Day (the actor-turned-singer even appealed for information at the time of her disappearance). The Downes family had moved from the West Midlands in 1999 when Charlene was 10.

The last time Karen Downes saw her daughter, Charlene was walking toward the Winter Gardens Academy, the town's famous elementary school. She was with her sister, Rebecca; they'd been to the Promenade, eaten at McDonald's, and played at Coral Island. It was a Saturday, but ever since she'd been excluded from school, Charlene had frequented these places a lot. Around 6:45 p.m. that day, Charlene decided to meet some friends, so she called them from a phone booth on Leopold Road. Rebecca went home. Charlene waited with her mom until her friends arrived. She gave her a kiss. "I won’t be late…"

When she went missing, Charlene was wearing black jeans with a design of a gold eagle on the front, as well as a black sweater with a white diamond design and black boots. To the rest of the world she'll be wearing a school uniform forever; that's what she's got on in the photo that picture editors normally drop into stories about her disappearance.

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A police handout of CCTV footage believed to show Charlene (highlighted) on the last day she was seen.

At around 8:30 p.m., on the evening she disappeared, Charlene met another friend. Together, they visited the Carousel Bar on the North Pier. At 9 p.m., a girl can be seen on CCTV at the junction of a main road that leads from the North Pier to the town center, situated on the junction of Dickson Road and Talbot Road. It's believed Charlene is the girl on the tape. She's with a woman believed to be in her 30s. The woman—who has blonde hair and a three-quarter length coat—has never been identified.

Charlene's friend says they left the Carousel Bar around 10 p.m. and went back to the town center. The last time she saw her was an hour later, in the vicinity of Talbot Road and Abingdon Street. This was the last confirmed sighting of Charlene Downes.

Charlene's disappearance wasn’t treated as a murder inquiry until 2006, when two men were arrested on suspicion of her murder and a third in connection with her disappearance. The two men accused were 29-year-old Iyad Albattikhi, originally from Jordan and the owner of the local Funny Boyz restaurant on Dickson Road, and his business partner Mohammed Reveshi, a 49-year-old former Iranian army sergeant and landlord of 42 properties. The former was accused of having sex with the schoolgirl. The latter with disposing of her body. The evidence appeared damming.

The Blackpool Gazette reported that the jury at the 2007 trial was told that police had bugged Reveshi's home. On the tapes, Albattikhi was heard jovially explaining that Downes' body had been "chopped up" and "gone into the kebabs," while Reveshi was recorded saying, "I just cannot forgive myself." On another recording, Albattikhi was heard asking about how long fingerprints last, to which Reveshi responds reassuringly, saying, "There is nothing left of her. She was here, she died, there really is nothing."

The two men had both previously told police they'd never met Charlene. At the time of his trial, Albattikhi was facing a rape trial, subsequently dropped. The jury had been told of 10 separate incidents involving Albattikhi and Reveshi and girls aged between 13 and 15.

However, the jury failed to reach a verdict. A retrial was set for 2008, though in the time that passed senior police officers raised objections to the surveillance evidence. The Independent Police Complaints Commission (IPCC) and Crown Prosecution Service (CPS) were informed. The CPS found no evidence against the two men and the trial was called off. Both men were paid £250,000 [$315,336] each in compensation. One of the men's lawyers accused the police of "incompetence, manipulation, and lies."

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Mohammed Reveshi now, in the documentary 'The Murder of Charlene Downes.' Photo: VICE Studios/Channel 5

The IPCC spent the following 18 months investigating. They deduced that the informant—the man who lived in the house police had bugged—had failed to be briefed correctly. That officers who had worked on the case were "inexperienced and untrained." That the conversations between Albattikhi and Reveshi hadn't been transcribed properly. The detective responsible for that job, Sergeant Jan Beasant, was ordered to resign following the conclusion of the investigation.

A week after the trial collapsed, Karen Downes stabbed her husband with a kitchen knife. "Our family is in meltdown," she told police. In a subsequent interview with the Guardian, she said, "I found out that Charlene was getting chips for a blow job. How can those bastards do that to kids?"

A police report—that was compiled in 2007, but only came to light in 2011—stated that "young people were being groomed and sexually assaulted both inside and outside of premises [in Blackpool] by a number of store owners and workers." The youngest was 11. Most, like Charlene, were aged between 13 and 15. The Daily Mail reported the total number of victims to be "at least 60," and explained that they were offered "food, alcohol, and cigarettes in return for sexual favors." Eleven stores were implicated. Another of the town's teenage girls, 15-year-old Paige Chivers, went missing in 2007. She has also never been found.

Most of the abuse occurred in a location distastefully known to the girls as "Paki Ally," situated between Talbot Road and Clifton Street. Children from foster homes or with unhappy home lives were deemed to be the most at risk. In the specific case of Charlene Downes, it was later revealed that the Downes family had been known to child protection agencies in Coventry and Walsall, before moving to Blackpool, who cited "continued child protection concerns." A convicted pedophile, Ray Munro—who Charlene's father had met while drinking—was living with the family at the time of Charlene’s disappearance.

In an excellent piece written by journalist Andrew Norfolk and published in the Times in 2011, a former senior Lancashire police officer explained that the report hadn't been promoted because the force had "concerns about upsetting community cohesion." Blackpool, it should be noted, is estimated to be around 96 percent white. The journalist Julie Bindel—these days better known for her divisive views on trans issues—wrote about the story extensively at the time, including an expose for the Guardian entitled "Beyond the Pleasure Beach." She has said she would have broken the story earlier, but for newspaper editors concerned their publications would be viewed as racist if they ran her articles.

"The first time I went to Blackpool was when Charlene had just gone missing," says Bindel now. "I cried all the way home. Charlene was a girl that was failed in life—but has also been in death."

"I also discovered," she continues, "that the police appeared to be scared to investigate the grooming gangs. Blackpool is a tough town... the police are no snowflakes—but there was fear on their part of fulling a race war in the town. People like Nick Griffin and Tommy Robinson were there fanning the flames of anger among local people. It had become about race and not justice for Charlene. [The police] just needed to make it clear that the majority of child sexual abusers and pimps in the UK are white men. Child abusers abuse children not because they’re from a particular ethnicity or religion, but because they’re child abusers."

Bindel is right. As Andrew Norfolk wrote in his Times article, "Most child-sex offenders in Britain are white males, usually acting alone. In a random sample of 269 individual cases in which the internet was used to lure and groom victims, more than 95 percent of the convicted offenders were white men aged from 18 to 70."

Unwittingly, Charlene has become a popular promotional tool for the British right-wing in the years since her death. Find a Twitter profile with the national flag of the United Kingdom in the bio, and somewhere between the words "Rotherham" and "7/7" on the timeline, her name will normally be found. The BNP even filmed interviews with Karen Downes on the Blackpool seafront for their YouTube series BNP TV. "No one else has been doing anything to help us," said Karen Downes. Frustratingly, she might have a point—where the police have let Charlene’s case fall away, racist British nationalists continue to exploit it to stoke division.

Justice for Charlene Downes looks a long way off. In 2013, a full-time senior officer was appointed to oversee the case. In 2016, a cold case team reviewed it and discovered CCTV footage of Charlene’s last known steps. Then, last year, a 51-year-old man—who'd been an initial suspect in Charlene’s disappearance the year she’d gone missing—was arrested. This brought the total number of men arrested on suspicion of Charlene’s murder to five. All have been freed without charge.

Unsettling revelations continue to drip out. The new VICE Studios-produced three-part documentary, The Murder of Charlene Downes—available to watch in full on Channel 5 now—recently broke the news that, upon Charlene's disappearance, Karen Downes waited two days to report her daughter missing to police.

Police have stated they believe that Charlene Downes was abused by as many as a hundred men prior to her death, but appear no closer to finding her killer. Surely this 14-year-old schoolgirl—a child who was let down continually throughout her life—deserves better than this in death.

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This article originally appeared on VICE UK.



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Monthly Horoscope: Sagittarius, June 2019

Partnership is a big theme for you during Gemini season, as the sun occupies the sector of your chart that rules your relationships—romantic or otherwise, including your relationships with your opponents!

Communication is highly important to you, Sagittarius, and conversations (and confrontations!) abound as the sun moves through Gemini. June 2 brings an especially intense energy for transformation as Venus in Taurus connects with Pluto, the lord of the underworld, in Capricorn. A breakthrough in changing your habits or a financial situation may arrive—plus, Venus and Pluto's harmonious connection is a sexy one! A new cycle in your relationships begins on June 3 when a new moon in Gemini lands. A clean slate has arrived, though it might not feel clear exactly what that means yet. Take it slow!

Communication planet Mercury enters intuitive and emotional water sign Cancer on June 4, finding you discussing complicated issues about everything including sex, death, and taxes—but interesting shifts take place as Mercury makes a helpful connection with electric Uranus in Taurus on June 7. Watch out for unexpected news, too. An energy shift arrives when Venus enters Gemini on June 8, bringing blessings to the relationship sector of your chart and making this an exciting time to flirt, connect, and have fun! The sun squares off with Neptune in Pisces on June 9 and opposes Jupiter in Sagittarius on June 10, which brings some confusion, but if you're able to go with the flow and not demand hard answers from anyone or anything, this could manifest as a brilliantly creative period. Plus, the sun opposes your ruling planet Jupiter, which is currently in your sign, which could also find you feeling plenty of pride and generosity!

Mars makes a harmonious connection with Neptune and opposes Saturn on June 14, followed by Mercury doing the same on June 16. Plenty of creativity flows, but you're also running into obstacles, especially concerning money or self esteem. This is a good time to remember that your worth doesn't stem from the number in your bank account. If you don't find that you have the material or emotional resources to accomplish something you want to do, I encourage you to be patient and take things one step at a time. This month's energy is busy, but it's one that's better for brainstorming and daydreaming than making commitments, due to Jupiter squaring off with Neptune on June 16. Jupiter and Neptune's clash finds us dancing in a mist of fantasy. Enjoy it until we get a reality check!

The energy can also feel especially heavy, emotional, nostalgic, and sensitive when it comes to issues concerning identity and family. So if you find yourself eager to start a new book proposal or plan your next vacation, but you don't have the time, money, or confidence, just set those realities aside for now and create a vision board and imagine it all instead of stressing about making it a reality. Spend lots of time dreaming...you, Sagittarius, are resourceful and a fantastic sales person, and you'll eventually get the resources you need; dreaming right now will help you get clearer on where you want to go and how you want to get there.

A full moon in your sign, Sagittarius, lands on June 17! Full moons are emotionally turbulent, so much comes to the surface. Gemini season has found you so focused on your partnerships that you may have ignored some of your own needs—but you won't be able to ignore them now! This is a good thing; sometimes we don't really know what we need until someone else shows us what that is or isn't. Our needs change with our situations, and as you know, dear Sag, life is always changing. This full moon brings you clarity on what you need in your life right now to bring your relationships into balance. Full moons are also a critical time for release. Consider that what you need may not be more of something, but letting go of something that no longer serves you.

Saturn connects with Neptune and Mercury meets Mars June 18, creating a supportive and productive energy. A sense of security is in the atmosphere, and having this support helps you work though emotionally charged issues. Just watch out for power struggles—especially concerning finances—as Mercury and Mars oppose Pluto on June 19. Tempers flare, and issues concerning greed, jealousy, and possessiveness come up for you to work through. Don't pick a fight, as it won't work out well for anyone. This is a powerful time to recognize and release control issues. Mercury enters its pre-retrograde shadow period on June 20, so pay close attention to the conversations that come up between then and the beginning of its retrograde on July 7 because those themes will be reworked and reimagined until August 1.

Neptune retrograde begins and the sun enters Cancer on June 21! Because you're usually busy and cheerful, people don't always realize how completely sentimental you can be. But as Neptune changes direction and moody Cancer season arrives, you are very much in your feelings. Neptune's retrograde finds you reflecting deeply on what home and family mean to you. This is a wonderful time to connect with your ancestors, energetically cleanse your home, or visit a place from your past. As for Cancer season: The sign of the crab is a tenacious one, famously stereotyped for gripping on to the past with its pincers. The question Cancer season asks you now, Sag, is whether you'll run away from your past, cling on to it, or do the emotional work necessary to process it and let it go. Tricky financial issues also come up for you to work with, like debts, taxes, and inheritances.

Venus opposes Jupiter on June 23 and squares off with Neptune on June 24, so mark these days on your calendar as being over-the-top whimsical! A magical energy flows in your relationships and you're in a nostalgic mood. The atmosphere is sweet, intuitive, and empathetic. This is a powerful time for you and your partners to come together and bond on a deep, emotional level. Just be careful not to over-indulge or spend beyond your means!

Mercury enters fellow fire sign Leo on June 26, putting you in an especially adventurous mood and bringing you news from faraway places. This is a wonderful time to travel (just be mindful of delays and frustrations during the upcoming Mercury retrograde beginning on July 7), study, share ideas, or even publish new work. You're more of a big picture person than a details person, Sag, but Mercury in Leo finds you flexing both muscles. Brilliant plans are born as the sun connects with Uranus on June 27, and something unexpected happens to balance out an awkward situation. Good luck this month, Sagittarius, and see you in July!



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How To Make Your Own AirPods for $4

Apple's Airpods are a tragedy. Ecologically, socially, economically—they're a capitalist disaster (or success story, depending how you look at capitalist endeavors in general). The batteries in the $160 wireless earbuds die within a year and a half, at which point they become useless.

The opposite of Airpods, then, is this extremely punk pair of DIY wireless earbuds that someone on Reddit hacked together using an old pair of wired Apple headphones and some hot glue.

"I started this project roughly two months ago when my friend got a new pair of AirPods for his birthday and I thought to myself, 'that’s quite a lot of money for something I can make at home,'" Sam Cashbook, who is 15, told me in a Reddit message.

Cashook started watching videos of people making their own AirPods, but mostly found people chopping the wires off of Apple headphones as a joke. He decided to take his own approach.

He bought a hands-free bone conduction headset from eBay (which transfers the sound vibrations from the bones outside your ear, to the inner ear), and took apart the casing to reveal the electronics. Then, he desoldered the wires from the original speaker in the headset, and connected his old Apple earbud speaker to the headset's printed circuit board.

"I replaced the battery with something a little bigger and hot glued it all together (definitely not the best approach)," he said. Viola, AirPods. Maybe a little uglier, but the headphones work well, he said. The set has buttons for power, pausing music, volume controls and skipping tracks, and the battery is rechargeable.

"This project was really fun and only cost me around four dollars, and helped me improve my soldering skills for smaller components," he said. "I encourage people to make cool things like this!"

And I, for one, encourage people to hack and repair and repurpose their electronics so they may never again need to buy into a system of wasteful class symbolism and status posturing dictated by the biggest companies in the world. Just be careful not to zap your brain if you decide to try this yourself.



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