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Even in places where recreational marijuana has been legalized, possessing more than the designated amount puts you at risk for both misdemeanor and felony charges. Which is to say it's (still) tempting to panic if you get stopped by cops with weed in your possession. Some people panic so much that they eat their drugs. Better to destroy your stash than get busted with it, right?
Wrong. Eating your drugs to avoid a possession charge is quite possibly the worst thing you could do. Take it from Texas lawyers Will Hutson and Chris Harris, who wrote the fun and informational song "Don't Eat Your Weed." We recently spoke with Hutson in search for some details on the nuts and bolts of eating weed and the law. Here's what he had to say.
VICE: What inspired you to write the song, "Don't Eat Your Weed"?
Will Hutson: Y'know, nobody really likes songs about breach-of-contract. The biggest contract you can breach is a marriage, but I don't do family law, so I couldn't really go that route. Chris and I were sitting around one day talking about criminal law. He does mainly contracts and stuff like that. He does civil law and I do the criminal side. And he was just blown away when I told him that it's not an uncommon thing in the state of Texas for a person who gets pulled over with marijuana to try to hide it or throw it away. It's not uncommon for a misdemeanor to turn into a felony that's punishable by up to ten years in prison if you try to hide or destroy evidence with police officers present and you know that they are undertaking an investigation.
So, we started toying with the words and the idea. To give Chris credit, he wrote 90 percent of the song. It came out of him like puke from a prom date. It was real fast and furious. They say the best songs are written in under ten minutes, and this one sorta wrote itself. So that was our inspiration, it was kind of just a discussion about criminal law.
One of the lyrics from 'Don't Eat Your Weed' is "Don't turn a Class B into a felony/ By tampering with evidence/ Don't be a dumbass/ Don't destroy your stash." What's the difference between a misdemeanor and a felony in this case?Generally speaking, any offense that has a punishment range of a year or less is a misdemeanor. In Texas, possession of four ounces or less of marijuana is a misdemeanor. But if I attempt to eat it... Now you've got possession and tampering with evidence, a felony.
But can I be really be arrested for possession if I eat ALL of the drugs first?
The answer is "Sure'" They will arrest you if you eat your drugs. The question is whether or not they're gonna be able to prove it, but they can arrest you for anything if they have probable cause to arrest. It's kind of hard to answer that question because it's on a case-by-case basis. It's going to be based upon what the officer observed and what his statement is going to be. Typically what you see is the person gets pulled over for possession, and the officer may see some sign that they were in possession of marijuana—like shake on the floor or something like that—and then they'll say, 'I saw them put something in their mouth and chew it up real fast and I told them to spit it out, but they wouldn't.' So it's really more of a cussing match at that point as to who a jury is going to believe.
Could the police detain me until I naturally expel the evidence from my body?
I can guarantee you it's not gonna turn out looking the same as it went in unless it's, you know, like these movies like Midnight Express where people are swallowing balloons full of heroin to smuggle them into the country. Weed is not going through your system unchanged. It's going to be metabolized to a certain extent. They're never gonna see that.
What evidence can law enforcement use to prove possession and evidence tampering, then?
It's gonna be based upon what they saw at the scene. So often, they hang their hat on a combination of three things: they'll use the terms "totality of the circumstances" and "my experience and training." They love to say things like, "Based on the totality of the circumstances... and my experience and training... I know that it was marijuana they were chewing, I told them to spit it out but they wouldn't, and therefore that is tampering with evidence because I let them know an investigation was ongoing.' It just snowballs from there. There are ways to fight it, but you do have to take it to a jury trial in order to do that. Prior to a trial, all you're doing is haggling with a prosecutor.
Could I argue I didn't realize the drugs I was eating would be considered evidence in a criminal trial?
The moment police pull you over, an investigation has begun. Now, granted, the investigation is going to be initially limited to whatever get the meaning and leave you alone.
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