Prison food is notorious awful. An inmate once described the meatballs in lock-up as tasting like an "entire groundhog was put through a wood chipper," and the cafeteria doesn't seem to ever step it up, even on days like Thanksgiving. Prisoners have to get pretty creative at the commissary or start a vegetable-smuggling ring if they want to eat anything close to gourmet. This week, a prison inmate apparently got so fed up with the lack of decent food inside that he decided to break himself out just to grab some grub.
According to the Dallas Morning News, the inmate, Joshua Hansen, successfully broke out of a Beaumont, Texas, penitentiary on Wednesday——only to get busted trying to sneak back into his cell with a bunch of snacks in tow.
Hansen reportedly staged his great food escape Wednesday evening, slipping out the back of the prison and into nearby farmland. But Hansen apparently wasn't interested in taking his newfound freedom, he just wanted a home-cooked meal.
Authorities busted Hansen as he attempted to sneak back into his cell unnoticed with a duffle bag. When they searched it, they found candy, chips, tobacco, bottles of whiskey and brandy, and "a large amount of home-cooked food," according to the Jefferson County Sheriff's Office.
According to the Beaumont Enterprise, sheriff's deputies had previously been tipped off that inmates on work release often sneak out to snag snacks and other contraband. The Sheriff's Department and a team of US Marshals set up surveillance Wednesday evening, which first spotted a vehicle drop the duffle bag full of goodies on private property nearby—and then caught Hansen as he zipped out to retrieve it.
It's unclear who dropped off the duffle bag or cooked up the fried chicken and green beans good enough to break out of jail for, but an investigation is currently underway, the sheriff's department says.
In the meantime, Hansen is back in custody and charged with escape and possession of marijuana, likely wishing he had chowed down on that bag of Fritos while he had the chance.
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