This week, Paul Manafort will become the first of Trump's ex-aides to stand trial thanks to Mueller's Russia probe. Manafort is accused of, among other charges, allegedly laundering more than $18 million through off-shore accounts to keep up his fancy, expensively dressed lifestyle without having to fork over any money for taxes.
According to new court filings, though, $7,000 suits weren't exactly Manafort's only splurge—he also dropped a whopping $18,000 on karaoke equipment, Talking Points Memo reports.
Of course, he also spent a shit-ton of money on other stuff, like blowing upward of half-a-million dollars on landscaping for his Hamptons home, so the karaoke setup doesn't seem exactly extravagant in comparison. Still, he forked over $500 for the machine itself, $950 on a "song package," $50 on two mic stands (ostensibly for duets), $600 for a touchscreen remote, and $6,000 on the installation alone, TPM reports.
Seeing as Manafort seems pretty serious about the art of karaoke, the news raises one important question: If he really loves singing karaoke so much that he's willing to drop five figures on some equipment, what's the man's go-to song?
Unfortunately, the court filings don't do a deep dive into Manafort's karaoke habits, and its doubtful that the trial will detour into that specific line of questioning, but we here at VICE are committed to getting to the bottom of this one—so here's a rundown of our best guesses for what Manafort jams out to when he's not living the VIP life in jail, starting with a stone-cold karaoke classic.
"It Wasn't Me"—Shaggy
Manafort has already pleaded "not guilty" to all 18 charges against him, so it seems like Shaggy's 90s summertime jam would be a natural choice for him. Of course, in the song, the weak denial doesn't really work out so well for Shaggy, since his girlfriend basically walks in on him mid-sex with another woman, but we'll see how it pans out for Paul.
"I Fought the Law (and the Law Won)"—The Clash
Another karaoke classic. It may seem like the law's already won since the guy spent a good chunk of this summer in jail, but Manafort isn't exactly "breaking rocks in the hot sun" or whatever—his time in lock-up actually sounds pretty plush.
"Rasputin"—Boney M
This song's got it all: Russia jokes, fresh-ass hooks, and more Russia jokes. Though Manafort's expensive slacks are probably not roomy enough to give him the flexibility to pull off this song's incredible dance moves.
"Up Like Trump"—Rae Sremmurd
OK, Paul Manafort has probably never heard this song before in his life, let alone belted it on some expensive karaoke equipment in his Hamptons home. But it's a great song, with references to both Trump and Russia before the man became president, so listen to it again and marvel at the fact that it's already almost four years old.
"Pardon Me"—Staind
A veiled message to Trump or just Manafort rekindling an old love for nĂ¼-metal? Why can't it be both?
"Take the Money and Run"—Steve Miller Band
All jokes about Manafort's tax evasion aside, the man is exactly the sort of boring-ass Connecticut Baby Boomer who would get sweaty drunk and belt Steve Miller Band in a failed attempt to reconnect to whatever sense of youthful exuberance he left in the mid-1970s.
But yeah, also this one's a joke about tax fraud.
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