Wednesday, December 19, 2018

Megan Fox's Archeology Documentary Series Is the Weirdest Show on TV

Megan Fox’s career is one that, when viewed through a 2018 lens, is pretty distressing.

One of her earliest appearances on our screens was as an extra in a strip club scene in Michael Bay’s Bad Boys II. According to Fox, Bay had her dance under a waterfall in heels and a bikini. She was in tenth grade at the time of production.

After an audition that involved being filmed washing a Ferrari in a bikini, Bay would cast Fox in the first two Transformers movies. Shortly after the release of the second, Fox compared Bay to Hitler in an interview and, in response, Bay posted an open letter to his website, allegedly written by an anonymous group of people who’ve worked on his movies, calling Fox an "unfriendly bitch," "dumb as a rock," and "classless." She was dropped from the third Transformers movie during rehearsals.

A few flops later, Fox, who had previously been one of the most talked about people in Hollywood, pretty much disappeared from the blockbuster landscape. Her biggest movies since have been the Michael Bay-produced Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movies, which she was cast in after apologizing to Bay.

Megan Fox examining a skull
Fox examining a human skull. Screencap via the Travel Channel

It is delightfully bonkers. Is it possible to think of a weirder TV moment from this year than Megan Fox, looking over the data from an aerial survey she commissioned in an attempt to locate the burial site of Achilles, saying, “This strange shelf-like anomaly jutting out from the burial mound is consistent with the work of Ancient Greeks”?

But it’s not just that scene. At almost any point in any of the episodes, if you just describe what’s happening on your television, you are probably saying the weirdest combination of words you have ever said. For instance: “Megan Fox is in a forensic tent in the English countryside, examining skulls recovered from a mass war grave” or “Megan Fox is interviewing someone she introduced as ‘pioneering the science of giantology’” or “Megan Fox just said Stonehenge is ‘like an eternal sudoku puzzle’” or “Megan Fox is wearing an EEG helmet so a neuroscientist can see how her brain reacts to the sound of rocks being bashed together” or “Megan Fox is in the Turkish countryside, reading the Iliad on an iPad.” It’s television produced by Mad Libs, and I loved every second of it.

Sure. There's definitely an argument to be made that it’s irresponsible for a woman of Fox’s stature to use her public platform to contribute to the “experts are wrong” narrative. But we live in the age of GOOP, astrology, Fake News, and Creationism. The most powerful person in the world right now is a climate change denier who apparently believes exercise is bad because the human body contains a finite amount of energy, like a battery. It seems unlikely this show could do any additional damage at this point.

And I’d definitely rather be watching her do something she feels this passionately about than one of the 14 Transformers movies Michael Bay says have already been plotted.

Follow Jamie Lee Curtis Taete on Instagram.

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