Monday, December 17, 2018

These Dragon Christmas Decorations Are Tearing a Neighborhood Apart

A Louisiana woman's unusual Christmas decorations have inadvertently ignited a beef on her street—because they've apparently got her boring-ass neighbors worried that she's a member of a "demonic cult."

Author Diana Rowland just wanted to celebrate the spirit of the holiday season by, naturally, setting up a bunch of inflatable dragons on her front yard. Of course, dragons are an appropriate and welcome addition to a lawn at any time of the year, bringing a nice Khaleesi vibe to an otherwise routine patch of grass—but one neighbor wasn't having it.

Rowland took to Twitter last Friday to post an anonymous letter one of her dragon-hating Grinch neighbors left, calling her decorations "totally inappropriate" and laying on some very thick self-righteous trash about "the true meaning of Christmas."

"Your dragon display is only marginally acceptable at Halloween," the note reads. "It is totally inappropriate at Christmas. It makes your neighbors wonder if you are involved in a demonic cult."

Of course, Satan worshippers are usually pretty chill folks who prefer Baphomet statues over blow-up dragons, but Rowland's incensed neighbor likely doesn't understand the intricacies of the Left-Hand Path. "Please consider removing the dragons," the letter continues. "May God bless you and help you to know the true meaning of Christmas."

Thankfully, Rowland apparently did consider the true meaning of Christmas, and came to the conclusion that it meant "add more dragons to your lawn and give them halos for good measure," because that's exactly what she did.


Rowland's neighbors may not appreciate the decorations, but it looks like the rest of the world does. She says she's been inundated by offers of money in support of her dragon cause. "I've been getting a lot of messages about fundraisers/collections to buy me MORE DRAGONS," she wrote on Twitter, "but I would much rather any Dragon Army money be donated to a worthy charity of your choice. Let's make this holiday season about joy and charity for all. Thanks!!"

No, no—thank you, Diana Rowland, for teaching us an important lesson this holiday season. If turning your neighbor's whiny bullshit into a charitable opportunity isn't the true meaning of Christmas, what is?

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